At Least She's Resourceful!

RETRO Post

Feb. 21, 2011

Judith wouldn't go to sleep tonight because she was afraid that there was going to be a duck in her bed. All I could think of to say was that ducks are scared of little boys and dogs, so she is sleeping with Gideon and a stuffed dog.

She also kept saying "Mrrrp" because apparently that is the sound a duck makes when a sheep steps on it, so she wanted the duck to be afraid of sheep (so Lambie could protect her?).

Duh

Judith (as soon as I pulled the roasted chicken out of the oven): "Dad, come and cut the chicken!"

Dave: "We need to let it rest for a few minutes first..."

Judith: "Uh, it doesn't need to rest, Dad, it's DEAD."

I Like Their Ideas Better Than Mine...

RETRO Post

March 1, 2011

I asked Gideon what he wanted for his birthday.

He replied "A chicken!"

Then Judith said "No, let's get him a windmill that generates electricity!"

Um, ok.

Honesty

Judith tossed her raisin box on the floor.

Me: "Hey, does the floor look like a garbage can?!"

Judith (looking around) "Um, almost."

I Didn't Even Mention the Presents...

RETRO Post

March 5, 2011

Judith (at a store): "Wow, I love that birthday cake!"

Me: "That's a wedding cake."

Judith (wide-eyed): "You get CAKE when you get married?!?!?!"

Marriage is starting to really appeal to Judith, you get cake AND babies, what else could she ever want? ;)

The Randomness of Parenting

Judith: "Mom, can you come and get my gummy bears off the ceiling!"



One of the many things you don't ever really expect to hear...

Manners are Important, Even for Play!

RETRO Post

March 5, 2011

Gideon was just playing with two cars, "driving" them along on the floor, then he stopped, and made one of the cars "sneeze", then the other turned and said "Gesundheit", and then they kept driving.

So random and hilarious!

5 Year-Old Wisdom

At Judith's dance class one day they were serving cake for the head instructor/choreographer's birthday. Judith's teacher warned the class that if they didn't behave, no one was going to get any cake, and that she would eat it all instead.

Judith promptly replied, in total seriousness, with: "You know, if you eat too much sugar, you will go crazy and then you will cry."

Her teacher totally cracked up, and apparently kept thinking about it and giggling through the entire class. She totally laughed her butt off as she told me afterwards.

Thankfully, the kids were good so she didn't have to eat all the cake and go crazy and cry. *phew*

Slacker

RETRO Post

March 6, 2011

I was sitting around with Judith, who was giving me a bunch of temporary tattoos, when Ruthie came up to me and handed me the broom.

At least someone around here is trying to keep me in line...

The Mental Image Was Amazing!

Gideon: "Knock knock."

Me: "Who's there?"

Gideon: "Interrupting pants."

Me: "Interrupting pants..... who?"

Gideon: "ZOOM!"

I almost peed myself. Even now typing this I am actually laughing out loud. He's awesome.

It's Important to Listen to Your Body!

RETRO Post

March 7, 2011

Judith (after finishing the Shred workout): "Mom, I think my body is telling me that we need to make cupcakes..."

She's Brilliant

Me: "Wow, Judith, those 8's you drew are perfect!"

Judith: "Those aren't 8's! They're bow ties! Bow ties are COOL!"

LOVE LOVE LOVE

Priorities

RETRO Post

March 8, 2011

I accidentally set off the fire alarm a little while ago (something fell on the stove burner, I didn't actually burn any food), and Judith came running with Lambie, and a blanket, and her dance trophy. She said she couldn't imagine her dance trophy being burnt!

Happy Easter!

Judith was tired of Ruthie getting into her candy stash, so she came up with a solution.



Now we will have to wait and see if the chocolate eggs get eaten before the Play Doh dries out.

The race is on!

Watching Daddy Play Computer Games Too Much...

Judith informed me last night that under her blankets on her bed there is a portal that goes to the moon, and she is NEVER coming back.

I bet if I make some French toast for breakfast she'd change her mind...

To The Ends of the Earth...

RETRO post

December 2010

Judith (to Dave): "You know, Santa goes everywhere around the world, EVEN Australia!"

Yeah, I Feel That Way Sometimes Too...

Judith: "I think Ruthie thinks that I'm her mom. You're just the feeder."

Um...

Judith (randomly): "Mom, how do you spell 'adios poop'?"

Suffering for the Sake of Creativity

Judith was pounding on a kids piano keyboard, resulting in a terrible horrible mishmash of sounds.

Me: "Judith can you please stop that!"

Judith: "But Mom, it's JAZZ!!!"

Oh, well, in that case, carry on.

Ruthie, Defender of Earth

"Fear the broom! FEAR IT!!!!!"

No Friends? No Problem!

I guess I need to contact Hasbro and inform them that they need to change the rules to "ONE to Four Players".

Poor Ruthie

"Oh dear, the snow seems to have me surrounded..."

What... Why?

I went in to check on the kids before I went to bed one night, and discovered that they had emptied out the closet, and were sleeping with all the clothes hangers.

The clothes are still all over the floor. *sigh*

Quick Recovery

Judith: "Knock knock."

Me: "Who's there?"

Judith: "Interrupting chicken."

Me: "Inter-"

Judith: "MOO!"

(Sudden shocked look as she realized she did the wrong animal, but not missing a beat she continued)

Judith: "Uh, the chicken lost his voice so he asked the cow to speak for him!"

No Worries

Judith (randomly): "Are there Daleks in Australia?"

Hmmm... that thought does make all of the lethal critters there seem a bit less scary.

There Will Be No Escape

Judith was making butterflies one morning...



And Gideon was prepared and vigilant. No butterflies were going to get loose in HIS house!

Best Photo Ever

Who cares what's in the box, it's TISSUE PAPER!

My Entrepreneur

Judith apparently has her own restaurant that she runs out of our kitchen.

It is a meat restaurant, and they serve lamb, monkey, and chicken, but NOT llama.

You get a FWEE orange when you walk in the door.

Water and using the washroom is also free.

Judith is the only employee.

You have to bring your own colouring pages and crayons.

Anything you colour at the restaurant, you have to leave at the restaurant.

If you bring your cat, it can go and watch movies downstairs while you eat.

There is also a pool for women who need to have a baby. And medicine. And they even have APPLE JUICE!



I ordered the monkey. Apparently it was boiled (I asked).

The Entourage

I must preface this post by explaining that Gideon has a number of his toys, plus his Blankie and water bottle that he likes to have with him at all times. For a while he was always trying to carry everything, and of course things would drop and he would freak out. So he started using a bucket to carry everything, and I have affectionately named it his "Entourage" bucket. It may seem like a bit much to some people, but he is very particular, and prone to anxiety, so this is a way for him to maintain some security, and I am ok with that.

Last night I was up nursing Ruthie, and Gideon rolled over in bed and knocked his "Entourage" bucket on to the floor. He sat up, and was about to freak out until he noticed that I was already there. Then he looked down at his bucket and its spilled contents, and I could see the little wheels in his head spinning. Then he quietly got out of bed, and curled up on the floor beside his spilled bucket. I guess that seemed like a better solution to him than trying to pick it all up and get back into bed!

It was so cute and sad at the same time. Of course I helped him back into bed once I was done with Ruthie.

I Caught Me a Purty Butterfly!

I Wish I Could Do That...

I love when he just curls up like a puppy and goes to sleep.

SWEET!

Judith: "Mom, if you get your room all cleaned up by the time it's your birthday, we will get you a chicken coop!"

Mutant

2 things Ruthie can get excited about...

1 - Broccoli.



2 - Snow in Spring.



Who is this child and how did she come from me?

Play it by Ear

Judith: (On the bed behind me doing flips) "Mom, watch me!"

Me: "I can't right now, I'm changing Ruthie's bum."

Judith: "Ok, well, when you hear the THUNK, just say 'COOL!', ok?"

Ice Cream Face

Have a bowl that needs cleaning?



No utensils required.

The Best of Both Worlds

The other day we were blessed (Hahahahahahahaha! I'm so funny) with yet another huge dump of snow. Judith, of course, went outside to play right away. She made a snow man as usual. Gideon was at the back door wanting to go outside too, but then I guess he changed his mind. He's not a huge fan of the cold.

A few minutes later, I hear Gideon yell "Mommy, come and see my snowman!" I was all... what? I peeked into the living room, and there Gideon was with his little snow man.



He was super proud, and warm to boot!



I told him that snow can't go in the living room, so he should take it outside. He didn't like that idea much, so he just came into the kitchen, and proceeded to eat his little snowman. But at least the carpet didn't get all wet. Hopefully it was clean snow. =S

I Have Failed as a Mother

Judith: (Upset that no one was coming over for Gideon's birthday, as she couldn't fathom a birthday without friends, even though we had his party the night before) "You NEED to call someone and invite them over. *Puts hands on hips and stomps foot* RIGHT NOW!!!!! Who are you going to call?!?!?!?!"

Me: (Instinctively) "GHOST BUSTERS!"

Judith (Storming off) "Aaargh, that doesn't even make any sense!"

What? Who doesn't get THAT?!

Cuteness

That is all.

Happy Birthday, Gideon!

Most of the time when we go out, Gideon insists on taking a toy train or car to play with, along with his Blankie and water bottle of course.

Yesterday he INSISTED on taking this spoon with him.



He was obsessed with this spoon all day.

My kids never cease to amaze me with their randomness.

But that's one of the many reasons I love them.

Happy 3rd birthday, Gideon!

Now It All Makes Sense

Last night Dave was trying to show Judith how to count in Binary, and it hit me.

They are both a handful.

No wonder this year has been so exhausting for me!

What Happened to Goodnight Moon?

Last night when it was just about the kids' bed time, Gideon must have been tired because he got his Blankie and water bottle and came up to me as I was typing away at the computer and said "Mommy, I want to go to bed, get off the computer. Say goodnight computer! Mommy, say GOODNIGHT COMPUTER!!!!"

Yikes, I got told.

Figuring it Out

Judith: (randomly as we were getting dressed one morning) "I am the oldest because I was born first! I was your first baby! Then you had Gideon, then you had Ruthie, then you married Daddy."

Me: "Actually, I married Daddy first, before I had babies."

Judith: "Oh, so Daddy is really your first baby then."

Hmmmm... yeah, that sounds about right. ;)